Wednesday night on October 13th pledges from the fraternity DKE (Delta Kappa Epsilon) were seen and heard shouting obscene chants like “No means Yes and Yes means Anal” among other things. They shouted this outside the Yale Women’s Center and young women’s dorms. This incident can be seen in many different ways. At surface level I think people would say that this was just a prank apart of the hazing process for these pledges and that it is all in good fun. The trouble comes with the words they were shouting and where they were saying these things. This was not just example of misogyny but a real attack on sex culture in this country and rape as a practice to “keep women in their place”. The article in the Ms. magazine blog gave a really interesting analysis of this incident that I didn’t initially think of when I heard about this issue. The author Michael Kimmel gave historical background about fraternities Yale and similar issues so that we can see that this is deeper than just a stupid frat prank. He attributes this to a need of these boys “to re-establish a sexual landscape which they feel has been thrown terribly off its axis”. The status of DKE on Colgate’s campus in light of this incident at Yale has also been a discussion point. The dismemberment of DKE on this campus was allegedly due to unethical hazing practices such as having to rape women to get into the fraternity. I think this speaks right to our class discussion about the group mentality. Within the homosocial identity of these frats they must devalue all things not “male” and they do that by using sex and sexuality. Most of these men in frats would not do half of what they do if they were by themselves. Sometimes when you’re a part of a group your individual morals are thrown out to become part of this bigger social collection. When you are in a fraternity especially on this campus you gain popularity and you have “pull” that you would not otherwise have without that frat. You are not just an individual anymore but you become the fraternity.
The problem with fraternities is that they allow for this homogeneous space where “boys can be boys” without the disturbance women. This is just like the concept of the “He-Man Woman Haters Club” in The Little Rascals. This homogenous club further perpetuates the idea that there are only 2 sexes and the dominant of the two are male. Historically in this country men have always been the one to have access to these public spheres and institutions which have allowed them to be in the company of one another without the presence or input of women. When women began to gain rights in the 19th century there was an outcry from men who felt that the dynamics of this country would change if women were allowed to be in the public sphere. They felt as though their club was being forced to become integrated with people who did not belong there. This idea that men have the inherent right to certain arenas like education is fueled by the idea that the exclusion of women in the public sphere is the way to achieve a great society. Men had been taking care of this country and maintaining the status quo since this country’s inception so they had no need for women other than for sex and reproducing. When women began getting rights to all of these public arenas men became scared and insecure. They were afraid that the status quo would be turned on it head and they would no longer be the dominant sex. As a result men came to use women more as a tool and trophy for their success and a marker for how cool they could be. By making women a quantifiable object there would never be a need to take them seriously and the status quo would remain.
When men began using women as markers of their “masculinity” that is when “the club” saw it as a tool to exploit women and therefore raise men. Women being seen as sexual objects are not a new concept. The idea of using women as sexual conquests to elevate the male ego is a rather newer concept. This is a western idea that if you are a male and you have multiple sexual encounters with multiple females then you are “the man” allows for men to assume social hierarchy. This double standard praises men and criticizes women. Within frats you will find that this is the common idea. Many of the frat brothers will act on this ideal in hope for acceptance and praise from the group. This in turn perpetuates itself as the dominant ideology within a frat. The women who participate in these activities don’t see what goes on in frats and think that they are just following social norms but actually they are also helping to perpetuate this ideology. When frat culture is the dominant culture on college campus’ and they control the social scene the fraternity ideas then become dominant ideas for the campus as a whole. This is what I feel has happened with Colgate. The hook-up culture’s link to frat culture on this campus is not a coincidence. People who don’t have these ideologies when they come to Colgate leave with them. When they join a frat they adopt that frat’s ideology and the “sexual conquests” is a key ideology.
This ideology is crucial pertaining to the dynamics of men and women on these college campuses like Yale and Colgate both originally all male campuses. The relationships are played out partly through sororities and fraternities. As we talked about in class there are different rules for sororities than there are for fraternities. Sororities aren’t allowed to have parties with liquor. These differences allow for there to be an overwhelming frat culture on these campuses because the sororities are not allowed to offset the influence of the more popular frats. I think in order to work on these differences we need to recognize that although women and men are different we need to hold everyone to the same standards or else we are adding to this divide and perhaps allowing men in these frats to perpetuate the idea of male superiority and thereby of female inferiority.
The inferiority of women to men is looked at when you look at rape. Rape is not an act of sex or of love but of dominance. It is often a man exerting his dominance over a woman by forcing her to do something of a sexual nature. This is an issue that many woman struggle with and that many men will never know. The courage and strength of people who have been raped to get help and share their stories is amazing. For men to make a joke of rape is not funny. The topic of rape is not funny because no one is free from the threat of rape and it can happen to anyone but because it is more likely to happen to women men feel they can joke about it. The slogan “No Means No” was said in many sexual assault and anti-rape rallies for women to let them know that if they say no than they are to be listened to and respected. When the pledges at Yale shouted No means Yes they completely negated women’s voices and basically said that whatever women say you should do the opposite. As Michael Kimmel said in the article the second part of the chant “Yes mean Anal” says something about sex in this country. “This chant assumes that anal sex is not pleasurable for women; that if she says yes to intercourse, you have to go further to an activity that you experience as degrading to her, dominating to her, not pleasurable to her.” The breakdown of the chant is really interesting because in it reveals the idea that men still are on top and women still are on the bottom of the social ladder and if that is not apparent than we can degrade you(women) until you get the point. The pledges were doing this in a group setting which feed into that group mentality. I am sure that mostly all of the men who were shouting the chant did not actually believe what they were saying but none decided to speak up and not do it they just went along with it because the prestige and popularity from being in the fraternity is worth people thinking that they as individuals are sexist.
Once you lose the protection of the group you become vulnerable and subject to being ridiculed for being an individual but in the group you can just blend. The frat provides that buffer where anything you say can be attributed to the frat and not your individual opinion. The frat in a way makes you shed who you are in replacement for the person you could be with that frat and if it includes becoming sexist then many men will just make that sacrifice. That is a sad fact for men in frats and puts the frat experience into perspective for me.
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